Hi! Welcome to Chapter 23.
Become evil. Rule the world. Maybe drink tea first and sit down for a bit.
“It is the responsibility of intellectuals to speak the truth and expose lies.”
— Noam Chomsky
When life gives you lemons, kick life in the nuts.
This month, there’s love, links, and Lovecraft.
Lovecraftian Observational Humour
Found my brand
Sometimes I ask questions online, that I already know the answer to, just to glimpse the howling pit of insanity from which people crawl forth like demons to give their answers.
To which a wise soul on Twitter responded: “Lovecraftian observational humour might be your very individual niche.”
I love the idea of Lovecraftian observational humour. I may have to steal that. scribbles it down in the back of my Necronomicon
It turns out my phone doesn’t know how to spell Necronomicon or Lovecraftian but does know how to spell Cthulhu. Clearly I’m in the mouth of madness.
Someone else on Twitter pointed out that I should have written in the Necronomicon in blood. It doesn’t accept other inks. At least not without paying a price for the transgression.
Don’t worry, I used red biro. It will never know the difference. Wait. I have to investigate a strange noise issuing forth from a dark place. Brb.
Anyway, there’s a howling pit of insanity and this is where people with weird-ass opinions about everything live. And sometimes I like to bait them by asking questions.
In unrelated news I’m now on Quora. Please come say hi.
You made the right choice (Thank you!)
Whenever someone signs up as a paid subscriber to my newsletter I release an unscheduled bonus public post for everyone. My way of saying thank you.
After a year of toiling away in relative obscurity there’s now quite a lot of you. Hello! Would you like a cup of tea? I’ll put the kettle on.
So thanks to your generosity I’ve unlocked all previously locked posts. All of them. The animals have escaped from the zoo and are now running loose.
This month’s post and next month’s post will also be free as in liberated from tyranny. Meaning anyone can read it and anyone can comment on it.
I’ll do a round-up post in the new year but I’m pretty sure you understand the concept of ‘all’ and are capable of looking through the archives.
If you want the juiciest morsels look for the posts marked ‘Chapter 23’ that went out on the 23rd of every month. Geddit? Good.
I just wanted to give you a heads up and say thank you as soon as possible. So, you know, THANK YOU.
If you have something you would like to see more of in these newsletters now would be a great time to let me know.
Here’s some of my stuff to read on the interweb. They’re all Friend Links so anyone can read them.
What Japanese Culture and Being an Outsider Can Teach You about Writing — All writers are gaijin
This is How I Got Started with Travel Photography — These photos of Japan will make you want to travel
My Secret Visualisation Technique to Dramatically Improve Your Stories — The true shape of a story
The Best Thing to do with a Good Book — Bibliomancy for fun and profit
Black Mirror — A Dream Narrative
‘Do the Work’ is the Ultimate Lifehack — The productivity secret you don’t seem to get
Should I Write Under a Pseudonym? — Inquiring minds want to know
Fiction is the Lie That Tells the Truth — Why I stopped writing fiction for more than a decade
If You Didn’t Vote Then Shut Your Mouth — Don’t advertise the fact that you’re an idiot.
My Corona — Never gonna stop? Give it up.
Make Money on Medium — Build Your Audience and Grow Your Income with Medium.com
What’s in Your Drafts Folder? — I’ll show you mine if you show me yours
No-One Gives a Shit About Your Blog — Seriously
Friend Links for Medium — All my Medium posts to the end of 2019
One Minute Reads for Writers — 30 posts in 30 days
jamesgarside.net — My website has links to most of my writing
Note: If you have a problem opening any of these links just try to view them in private browsing mode and that will probably do the trick.
And now a word from my sponsor
I mean you, dummy.
I’m an independent writer.
You’re basically an official sponsor if you support me in any way.
Either that or a very nice human being. Or alien. Or robot.
I mean that in a good way.
I’m free to Skype every Sunday with anyone who wants to chat during lockdown.
Please feel free to reach out to me at any time.
Let me know what I can do to help you.
Thanks for reading.
As always feel free to #AskMeAnything