Hi! Welcome to Chapter 23. Become evil. Rule the world. Maybe drink tea first and sit down for a bit. “Culture is not your friend.” — Terence McKenna Life is but a dream — but you’ve still got to get out of bed in the morning. This month, there’s a shaggy dog story, friend links […]
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Hi everyone, Asshole Astrology is my faux horocscope column where I pretend to provide ‘horoscopes for horrible people.’ It doesn’t matter when you read it, or which sign you are, as horoscopes are all made up. It started as a joke. People like them a lot. And it has gotten a little out of hand. […]
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Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash A distressed writer asked me: “Why can’t writers sell their books, that they’ve agonized and slaved over, sometimes for years, for the price of a cup of coffee?” To which I replied: “Because our consumer society values coffee higher than books. People buy what they want — be that coffee or books.” […]
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Hi! Welcome to Chapter 23. Become evil. Rule the world. Maybe drink tea first and sit down for a bit. “A concept is a brick. It can be used to build a courthouse of reason. Or it can be thrown through the window.” — Gilles Deleuze Hollywood has always been obsessed with image over talent. […]
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Here is next week’s horoscope for your sign. It doesn’t matter when you read it, or which sign you are, as horoscopes are all made up. This week it’s make your mind up time. Do you love these horoscopes enough to want them in your life? If you do then please sign up for a paid […]
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Why aren’t my words the focal point of your existence? If they were you would have signed up for my newsletter by now. Or given me all of your money so that I can spend it on tea. Those are literally the only two options. Here is this week’s horoscope for your sign. It doesn’t matter when […]
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Photo by Kyle Glenn on Unsplash I published 30 posts in 30 days. I’ve pulled links to them all together in this list post for ease of reference. These are all friend links — because I love you — so you will be able to read them whether you’re a member of Medium or not. I must remember […]
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Hi! Welcome to Chapter 23. Become evil. Rule the world. Maybe drink tea first and sit down for a bit. “You don’t write a novel out of sheer pity any more than you blow a safe out of a vague longing to be rich. A certain ruthlessness and a sense of alienation from society is […]
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Asshole Astrology Horoscopes for Horrible People Here is next week’s horoscope for your sign. It doesn’t matter when you read it, or which sign you are, as horoscopes are all made up. Asshole Astrology is now an actual thing. I blame you. I figured some of you wouldn’t want it to become a regular part […]
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Hi! Welcome to Chapter 23. Become evil. Rule the world. Maybe drink tea first and sit down for a bit. “For a writer there is no such thing as an exemplary life.” — Tobias Wolff My birthday is 23 June. I’m trying to relax. This is more difficult than I remember. This month, it’s my […]
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Here is next week’s horoscope for your sign. It doesn’t matter when you read it, or which sign you are, as horoscopes are all made up. Everybody knows that astrologers are basically assholes with too much time on their hands and most horoscope writers are failed writers and barely functioning alcoholics. I mean that in […]
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